Saturday, June 27, 2009

I NEED YOUR HELP

Hi all.. So i'm trying to write a story.. An actual story.. And I'm giving you all a sneak peek... I really really really need a lot of comments to know if it grabs ur attention. please.. THANK YOU SO MUCH;****

Ps. Tara its a comedy.. adre hard to believe by the events ur going to read now.. bss this is the first scene...

Sneak Peek:

She was standing still, shivering... Though the mansion was freezing, it wasn't nearly as cold as his eyes. After moments of silence, he spoke.

“I pity you. And I also feel somewhat sad. Don’t get me wrong. I’m not sad because I feel something for you. I’m sad because I feel sorry for throwing you out of my house. So here’s twenty KD. I’ll also be generous enough to give you half an hour. When I get back, I don’t want to see you here. Oh, and remember, you leave, my children stay. Do you understand?”

Surprisingly, his question, “do you understand” was very suitable considering the situation Jude was in. Jude understood many things, however at that moment, she did not fathom anything Adam was saying. She didn’t even know what to ask. She didn’t know what was going on. He threw the twenty KD at her and walked away.

“Adam.” She called.

“Jude. Have you no self esteem? Hahahah. I know I know. Self esteem? You? What a joke. Honey, get out with some dignity. Go on.” He said.

“Get out where? Why? I don’t understand! I didn’t do anything wrong! I can’t leave my children! I won’t leave my children.” She cried hysterically!

“Oh really? And what are you going to tell the judge when you fight me? Don’t forget what you are. Now get out!” He yelled. The echoes of his voice scared his daughter, who followed his voice to the dining room.

“Mom, Dad! What’s going on? Why are you fighting? Mom, why are you crying?” Asked their twelve year-old daughter.

“Get out Sara!” yelled Adam.

“No! I won’t! Why are you making mom cry?” She demanded.

“I see our lovely daughter gets her bad traits from your side of the family. While we’re on that subject, how about we tell her about your family roots, Jude.” Said Adam, cunningly.

“Sara, go upstairs. Now!” Jude Demanded. She couldn't let her children know about her roots. Sara was shocked.. She stared but knew better than to further defy her father. She went to her room.

“Now, may you leave?” Asked Adam. Jude looked the man she married thirteen years ago in the eye.

“I will take my children.” She stated.

Adam grabbed her by her neck and shoved her into the wall. He beat her while she was screaming and kicking for help. She tried to fight and kick back but her petite frame did not support her struggle. The more she tried, the more he beat her. She lay helpless on the floor. Then he pulled her to the door and picked her up. He did not show any mercy. By that time, Jude was unconscious. He drove her away from his house and woke her up. He wanted her to see what he was going to do. He wanted her to remember this moment. He wanted her to be forever scarred.

“Get up.” He said as he nudged her.

“Where am I?” She cried. It was one of those rare rainy nights. She didn’t recognize the city, the houses, anything. Adam got out of the car, opened her door and got her out of the car. When she tried to resist his attempts, he grabbed her hair and pulled her out of the car. She fell and by the time she tried to force her bruised body to get up, Adam and his car were long gone.